warning

this website requires javascript and is best viewed with a computer on a 1920 x 1080 screen. the webmaster is openly mobile-phobic and refuses to do anything about it.

this website also contains a petulant little website navigator whom i would not trust with anything, but he's kind of stuck here... talk to him at your own discretion

 
 

please click the computer to continue

(or just click here if you hate fun)